I'm turning 22 next week. I still feel 19, just more stressed. I haven't made any real plans with my friends or family. I was supposed to go to dinner Tuesday night with a few friends, but they haven't replied to my texts about it, so I guess not. Chad's going to pick me up after class on Wednesday and we're going to make lasagna mmm. Two co-workers want to take me out for drinks after but they both open in the morning, so it will literally be A drink before I go home. I was tempted to look up places that let you drink free on your birthday, but I think I've had enough drinks this month. I have no idea when I'll see my family but that's okay. I've been kind of a bitch to them during my downward spiral and I don't think they've forgiven me just yet.

My doctor/psychiatrist wants to put me in anti-depressants. Therapy truly begins in two weeks. I have no doubt in my mind that therapy will relieve every bit of stress I have. I don't like how the drugs make me feel, especially at night. I'm not sleeping more than two hours at a time and when I wake up, I feel like I'm going insane. I'll call the office and see how they feel about me taking melatonin before bed. I really want to sleep.

I'm working on getting better. Slower than recommended, but at least I'm trying, right?